Learning to let go

Well, last Wednesday ended up being anything but a "normal" day for me.  In fact, it was my first close-up and personal experience with the police here in Cusco.  After living here for almost 7 months, I suppose that I have become a bit comfortable with my surroundings, less observant, and (yikes!) perhaps even a bit careless.  The day began as many of our days do - morning coffee :) , checking email, quiet time, preparing for the day ahead.  Since it was Wednesday, I prepared to head to the clinic.  I packed up my backpack and headed for the combi (bus) stop - which is called a parada.  I didn't have to wait long before a combi arrived that was heading close to the clinic.  I hopped aboard and was able to find a seat - that doesn't always happen - sometimes I have to stand :(  Well, the combi was crowded - not unusual - so there were some people standing.  Two men were standing next to where I was sitting.  I was sitting with my back to a window and my backpack behind me (which is a no-no. My backpack should have been in front of me.).  Anyway, as more people got on the combi, the men started crowding me.  That actually is not unusual when you are on a combi :)  I mean we're talking about a vehicle the size of a van that typically crams 25-30 people inside!  You kindof get used to close quarters.  Anyway, the two men would occasionally talk, so I knew that they were together.  Well, the combi stopped at a parada (bus stop) and the men quickly got off.  Another seat opened up across from me, so I decided to move because I felt so crowed where I was.  As I got up to move, I realized that my backpack was unzipped and that it felt much lighter than it should.  I quickly looked inside and, to my horror, my laptop computer was not there!  I immediately yelled "baja", which meant that I wanted to get off.  Well, the person who operates the door and collects the money told me that I couldn't baja because we weren't at a parada.  So I shouted, "el ladron" and everybody on the combi began yelling. The driver then stopped very quickly so I could get off.  I took off running back toward the parada where the two men had gotten off the combi.  (I think that may have been the first time that I've run any distance here in Cusco :)  I arrived at the parada and, sadly, I did not see the men.  They probably took off running the moment they got off the combi and, no doubt, they ran much faster than me.  However, up ahead I saw several members of the Policía Nacional so I decided to run to them for help.  Needless to say, I was extremely out of breath when I finally reached them.  And to be honest, I was about to cry.  But they were very nice and patient and gave me a minute to calm down.  As soon as they heard (and understood :) my story, they told me to quickly get in one of the trucks with two of the policemen.  I thought that I confused them with my spanish and that they thought the men were still on the combi and that we were going after the combi.  So I began to explain again and they quickly told me that they understood and that they wanted me to ride around the area to see if I could spot the men.  So - I jumped in the back of the truck and spent the next 15-20 minutes with the policemen scouring an area of San Sebastian.  After awhile, it became apparent that we weren't going to find the men, so the Policía Nacional took me to the Policía de turismo in Wanchaq.  After filling out paperwork there, they realized that I needed to be at the Policía Nacional police station in San Sebastian.  So back into the truck we go to return to San Sebastian.  I have to say that the two policemen that I spent most of my time with were very nice, helpful, and friendly :)   Once we arrived at the police station in San Sebastian, they made sure that the police there knew what had happened and why I was there before they left me.  After a short time answering questions at the San Sebastian station, the brigadier officer took me to another police building which was back in the Wanchaq area.  Once there, a police woman listened to my description of the man that I saw and made a composite of him on the computer.  The composite will be posted, along with details of the crime.
To be honest, I'm not very hopeful about my computer being returned.  I'm not trying to be pessimistic - just realistic.  Obviously, I'm experiencing a variety of emotions - anger, frustration, guilt, sadness . . .  And, of course, there are the "ifs" - if I hadn't been running late, I would have been riding in the Wilson's van with Nathan and the boys instead of riding the combi;  if I had turned left instead of right, I would have ended up at a different parada stop;  if I had gotten on a different combi.  But - these ifs also help to remind me that it is God is sovereign and He is the one who is in control.  I'm reminded of a verse that I learned in the Crown Financial Bible study - "Everything in the heavens and earth is yours, O Lord, and this is your kingdom. We adore you as being in control of everything. Riches and honor come from you alone, and you are the Ruler of all mankind; your hand controls power and might, and it is at your discretion that men are made great and given strength." - 1 Chronicles 29:11-12 TLB
Everything in the heavens and earth (including my computer :) belongs to God.  Yes, I'm sad that I lost my photos :(  and still a bit bothered that someone else is using my computer right now :(  - but, I'm also learning to let go and trusting God to use this for His glory in a way that only He can do.